Tuesday, June 26, 2012

today we celebrate

Today is a very special day. Today is the day that the woman who watched me grow would be turning 63. This is the woman who showed me the true meaning of a birthday celebration. This is the woman who taught me how to swaddle a baby. This is the woman who taught me how to wear eyeliner without looking like a street walker. This is the woman who knew the latest gossip before it even happened. This is the woman that lived for fun in the sun. This woman is my beautiful mother.
Celebrating this day without her is such a shame. My heart will never mend from the hurt of raising children without her by my side. They are all missing out on something so wonderful.
It is an inconvenient truth to deal with the fact that she hurt so badly here on earth and wasn't healed. It is just a big fat bummer. It is a precious gift how the healing came in a different form. Jesus healed my heart from her loss. He unhardened me from the pain of her loss and the relationship that we had together. He opened my eyes to where I was holding back. There was a healing...it just didn't take place in her body. The perfectly crafted memories that I have of her fade daily. Sometimes I can smell her and even hear her voice and other days I struggle to remember exactly what the creases in her face looked like when she laughed and smiled. Death is inconvenient. Mourning is inconvenient. Loss and pain are inconvenient. But we are blessed with an eternal perspective that heals our soul from the inside out. If we let Him light our fire then we radiate His love. Somedays that is easier said than done.

Nobody can duplicate the love of a mother. Nobody can ever love me just the way she did. Fortunately the Lord has placed some amazing Titus women in my path...not to replace my mother...but to love me and cherish me in the way a mother loves a child. It will never be the same, but there are women standing in that gap and I am forever grateful. Today I pray for my mom. I pray for the people who loved her too. I pray for the lives she touched and the grandchildren she leaves behind. Bryce and I are going to plant a lemon tree in her memory. She was just a lemon kind of lady. I don't even know how to explain that. She just was :)

Saturday, June 9, 2012

a million pics from pine cove

There is just not enough time in the day for me to write how much we loved family camp at pine cove. Our family grew leaps and bounds in just a week. The time we had together as a family and Justin and I had as a couple was priceless. Matt Carter from the Austin Stone was our speaker. His family was so fun and he spoke TRUTH to us each day. He challenged us big time. I feel like there is just no better place we could be "one year later" We have learned that this "death sentence" has given us LIFE! So much life. A new and clean perspective on this temporary place. We are refreshed spiritually and emotionally. We are physically pooped from all the activities...and above all we are just THANKFUL

. Here is our week in pictures:

driving up to camp...

this is where we called home for a week :) whew...tight quarters! but still so fun!

bryce on the fun swing

the food was actually awesome for camp food! i was expecting to be majorly depressed because i am pretty picky...but it was great. brody was our family champ at eating. 

the AMAZING pool that we played in every afternoon during family free time


dive in movie

our walk "home" 

brody and bryce begged to sleep together
this is before...

this is after :)

breakfast trail ride was a fave

a fun little treat was that my meme and papa who only live about an hour from camp were able to join us for tuesday night banquet! it was so special to have them eat with us and see what we were up to!! 

family worship time

brody was a tiny spoiled at camp. there was not a counselor around that was gonna tell that boy no. this sweet girl actually stopped playing the keyboard so she could drum with our toad. 

we had fun at the craft store! brody picked out a little box and a B to paint ...
but he also chose to paint his face. of course. 

brax painted a snake (and ate a ring pop)

after craft...headed to the pool to wash all that off!

bryce painted a lizard and a stuffed bear

pickle ball was a camp highlight for everyone! justin played in a tournament on the last day...but here he played on a team with the cutest guy around. 

and they played these cuties

this is how brody and sarah play pickleball

this is what brody and brax were doing at 10pm

we spent a lot of time in the lagoon! 
we zip lined and went down the giant slide and canoed and lots of other fun lagoony things. 

more pool fun

bryce was TRICKY to get a picture of because he was never still long

the counselors were just too much to handle. they were just completely amazing. they were so fun and loving and played with our kids and helped us with EVERYTHING. the counselors make camp feel like home. i wanted to tie them up and steal them. 

on the last night bryce's cabin was given character awards. his counselor "mr smoothy" gave him the character CREATIVE. he was pretty excited about that! 


brody and his very very best girl "Haco" she was one of a kind!

We will be back at Pine Cove next summer.