December is always a busy time. There are lots of things going on at school and at church and with friends. Fun things and important things, but honestly all I really want to do is hunker down with my family by the fireplace and bask in all the glory of Him and the gifts we have right here in our living room. Much of this has to do with the fact that I am a major weenie and I am afraid of the cold! I am not typically a hunker down kind of girl, but as God has changed our story so significantly... being home is where I now feel the most full. There are moments when my relational soul feels stuck at the lack of commitment we are able to make outside of the home right now...I miss making plans and I miss seeing my husband enjoy the company of others. But, right now God has him planted at home and we are no longer WAITING. We have stepped (temporarily I am sure) out of a season of waiting and wondering. We are not seeking new doctors and new answers, we are not looking ahead to a time when things will be better, we are not waiting. God has given us peace to sit and rest. He has shown us how to be still. And don't you worry...I put up a fight on this as often as I can. Being still is NOT what I do best. I always want to know what is NEXT. I want to know where I will be serving next and how He will use me in the coming season. For now, He has given His word that we are just where we are supposed to be. Serving in the places we are called to serve and dwelling in the overwhelming spirit of peace. God knows what is next but He still suffers along with us, He feels each ache and pain that Justin feels, He cries the same tears we do, He sits still in this place with us. He is going to fully heal Justin, and that is a promise! God's unending resources leave us feeling OK with what is happening NOW. Not much is happening, but SO much is happening. He is healing our family in ways I didn't realize we needed to heal. He has shown us how to serve right now...it looks so different than before! But one thing is for sure, there is no diagnosis or sickness or pain or fear that will keep this family from sharing what has been shared with us. Sitting idle is NOT what the Macs are about...because we don't believe that is what God is about. It is funny how much He allows us to do...even when He asks us to rest. Our God is so complex, yet so easy. Love it.
