days like today

Days like today (the yucky kind) when nothing worked out quite right are the days when I miss my mom the VERY, very most. I still feel like I am waking up from a bad dream about her being gone, I still have such an unsettling feeling about losing her. Today is they type of day her and I would have done something special. Right now we would be shopping for Braxton and loving on my boys. We would go somewhere really yummy for lunch and the day would be all about us...her, me and my boys. She was always so good about making me feel so special. When I talked to her about the boys she never brought up her other grandkids, she truly understood that Brody is perfect, she was genuinely and seriously proud of the life that Justin and I have made...and that kind of person is hard to find. She was my rock for sure. Days like today when Justin has not been home in the daylight hours since Sunday, has not been able to eat breakfast, lunch or dinner with us all week, and fun plans keep falling through are hard. Not having my mom here leaves me definitely a little lonely during times like this. I am so blessed and gifted that I have an amazing husband that has so much work right now he does not know what to do...that is certainly a good problem to have, especially now. I am so blessed for this man that LOVES to work and loves what he does and provides for us so there are never any worries. I am blessed for my two precious children that can be with me ALL the time (ok it would be nice to get a break from them atleast once a year haha) and I am grateful in every way. BUT I am still sad that my mom is not here. I am still sad for my kids that they dont get her love every single day. I definitely feel lost at times and I miss her pulling me out of my rut. I miss having my "partner" that I could always count on and that was always there.
By the way, Braxton is now the size of a bell pepper.